Thursday, December 30, 2010

2011: FoodSnob Returns....Why? Because it can.

The start of 2011 begins a new year and thus a new beginning for Food Snob DC is in order. It is in order for precisely this reason – we spoiled upper middle income east coast Americans with our latte’s and our fancy hand bags and leather shoes and reliable public transportation and pretty much everything one’s heart could desire … well … we have a duty to not take these things for granted and live our lives to the fullest and utmost potential – and I’ve decided that for me, that includes, but is not limited to, continuing to write about my preferences, particularities, petty complaints and rants on this pretentious food blog. Congratulations, I have returned.

Why do I love food so much? Why do I relish in discussing every delicious moment my taste buds enjoy and equally love critiquing the inadequacies of every single item I digest? Being home over the last few days, I’ve had an epiphany and it answers this exact question. You can count on food. Food is manageable; malleable … it can be sculpted to exactly what your heart desires. Food can be molded, kneaded, shredded, braised, broiled, boiled, scorched, toasted … it can be what you make it – it is completely in your control. It can be controlled, whereas, people cannot. People are unreliable, unpredictable, unstable … you can’t put a person in a 350 degree oven for 45 minutes and they come out juicy and plump! Food, is not over-emotional or melodramatic (unless you are watching Man v. Food on the travel channel - disgusting!). Food does not infer that you have ulterior motives or question your competency. Food is like a laborador puppy, looking straight into your eyes and only asking for one thing - love me.

You can’t caramelize a human being in a pan for 30 minutes on medium low to ensure he or she turns out sweet and creamy (well I suppose you could, but that would be disgusting). No, people you can’t control, they are crazy and you can’t count on them. But food, food obeys you and listens to your every move – the only thing that can ruin the creation of a good meal is … you.

Every year for the holidays I fly home to Northern California and spend some quality time with the family and friends. I fly back to DC and spend some quality time with friends here on east coast as well before I return to work. As much as I absolutely love these people - it seems that people have a relentless ability to nitpick at each other, to question each other, to disagree, to annoy, to hound, to demand. Of course, there is the positive loving side as well. But you know, through it all, there always seems to exist a true sense of love and devotion we share for one another (and the last seven days I've spent at home have made it blatantly evident just how filled with love our home is), bad television (i.e. Wall Street: Money Never Sleeps can still be good as long as you’ve got someone to laugh out loud with) and delicious, delicious, scrumptious, rich and delectable food.  So, this holiday season, instead of bickering with your friends and family, cook something that tastes effing delicious and shut up and eat.